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Category Archives: Life Lessons

Stuck

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She spoke in scars

Bitterness of broken heart

Sailing with the undertows

Salty sting of ocean tears

Refreshing her pain

There was safety there

Reeling to the beat of

“It’s- not- my- fault”

Making peace with the fog

So she didn’t have to see

 

Sunlight beckoned but

She reveled in the rain clouds

Trading rainbows for permafrost

Frozen, hard fast in the loss

In time, she’d rewind in the wind

Dust off the grudge and wrath

Wipe the mist from the mirror

To see more than lines on her face

More than the misery of this place

Cue the music

And dance wildly to the light

 

 

I am hosting Poetics at dVerse Poets Pub. We are writing to “Life Lessons”. “What is one thing (or more) that you have learned that you feel could change another life? Well at least improve it.” Please share with us in a poem. There is still time to join in. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To Listen

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I hear the rustle of reeds

Where meadow meets pond

Wails and yodels of the loon

The flit-flutter of dragonfly wings

I have powwows with the stars while

Luna spills stories into my cupped hands

The stoic oak articulates to me, his fears

And I stroke his tired skin

I heed to the beat of my own heart

And the steady rhythm of silence

But when words sail from your tongue

To faraway places

I am still learning

To listen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For this week’s Poetics at dVerse Poets Pub. I am your host and I am asking you to write a poem about something you are still learning. Doors open at 3 p.m. EST.  Join us!

Wild Water

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November 016

 

 

Don’t ever lose what you came here for

Dreams lost between fingers

Float aimlessly so

Haunting you, taunting you

Forging the flow

Of what you cannot

And what you will sow

Like they know

Hah! Like they know

~

Don’t ever lose what you came here for

Thoughts and faint hearts

Will easily dissolve

Diluting, polluting

Your streams of resolve

Diverting your course

To bowers and bays

That lead you astray

Hah! Sail away

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…#25

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“Strength can be silent.”

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This one is still very hard for me…another lesson in progress.

Why?

My shyness crippled me when I was a child, a teenager and even into my twenties.

It took me a long time to grow “a voice”.  It took me a long time to be confident about my own opinions and a longer time to not care what others think of them. I find it very hard to be silent in a situation that is harmful to others. I want to fix things. I enjoy making a case. I enjoy writing a letter of complaint. (Can you get paid for that?) I am actually pretty darn good at it. Speaking up for something that I strongly believe in?  My cup of tea.

Despite this, I am learning that sometimes I just need to listen…even if it means listening to the silence. Sometimes the silence says that I am saying too much, that maybe I am over compensating for my own inadequacies or maybe I am speaking on the behalf of others, when they haven’t given me the floor.

Sometimes…I just need to be quiet shut up!

Strength is not always about raising your voice. Sometimes it is about restraining yourself from doing just that.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…#23

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“If you constantly blame others, you will never see your own mistakes.”

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Pretty self explanatory. You’re not perfect. You never will be perfect. You can be 99.9 percent right, but never 100 percent. If you are, then you may have landed here from some unknown planet because this planet, my friends, is full of humans. Humans falter on a regular basis.

Breathe…falter….breathe…falter.

Catch those breaths in between.

Look in the mirror. Reflect on your actions.

It might not be pretty, but you will discover something amazing…an enlightenment, so to speak…a realization of your own flaws and blunders.

This can change your life.

I remember an extremely difficult workplace situation years ago, that took me close to a nervous breakdown. I look back now and wonder why ….no make that “WHY OH FLIPPIN’ WHY” would I react the way I did!  Even though I truly had been treated very unfairly, that is all I saw. They were wrong. That was it.

But that isn’t it. In every interaction or relationship, we have strengths and weaknesses that come into play. Even if we are “right”, we can present it the wrong way. Presentations are like a land mine of misunderstandings waiting to happen…and in our quest to be heard and understood, we make mistakes. And that isn’t all of it. Sometimes, we really are wrong. We forget or refuse to take the time to look into that crystal clear stream of reality and see our own imperfections.

Enough said.

A Good Mother

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I built a wall around you

Believing that was right

Pushing away the darkness

To hold you in the light

Brick upon brick

Arms wrapped around you

Leaving you nowhere

To fall or hold on to

Except for me

But I don’t count

Because a good mother

Would have let you out

A good mother

Would have sewed you a cloud

To sail to the sun

And sing out loud

To swell up with tears

That rain on parades

To play with the lightning

And not be afraid

A good mother

Would have loved you from afar

Forgot where you came from

And learned who you are

She would have braved her own demons

And dried her own tears

Harbored your anger

And welcomed your fears

A good mother would love you

And that I have done

But you broke the wall

You found the sun

wall

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…#22

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“Friends do not always reveal themselves.”

I am still hanging on to the theory that we were put on this earth to share with others. Whether it be our time, our possessions, our abilities, our talents, our compassion, our stories…whatever we have to give, I think we are supposed to give.  When doing so, sometimes we are blessed with interactions that lead to friendships.

Friendships are gifts. The problem is that sometimes they are hard to identify. If only they came in neat little packages tied up with a bow…with a little tag that says, “Really, I’m your friend..for real.”  Between reading social cues, dealing with your own personal insecurities and the fear of forming assumptions, it can become complicated…at least it has been for me. Maybe I’m just a freak so unique that I have trouble with this. I am a very open person. This could hinder the process of some potential friendships. I probably scare the hell out of people. Would I change this about me? Absolutely not.

So what have I learned about friendships?

I’ve learned that often I am afraid to call them that.

I know what I think a friendship should be.

My eclectic personality requires a wide variety of friends.

I’ve learned that the more time someone gives me, the more I feel they are truly my friend.

Although I do not fear rejection (because I am secure with who I am), I get frustrated when I can’t determine the intentions of others. I am not sure if this is a problem on my part or theirs.

For the most part, I think I am a good friend.

I treasure the friendships I have.

A friend can come in any size, race, age, occupation, social background, education, etc.

Openness is key to me.

Your spouse can be your best friend.

Anything pretentious, materialistic or superficial does not interest me.  My relationships need to be deeper.

I have learned that even at my age, I still have lots to learn about establishing friendships.

In my opinion…

A good friend truly cares about you, would do almost anything in the world for you, listens to you, advises you, confides in you, laughs with you and cries with you.

A good friend is someone who doesn’t care what you look like, accepts all of your faults, your mistakes and never gives up on you.

A good friend has no ulterior motives for being your friend.

A good friend considers the reasons you have become who you are.

A good friend sees your positive traits and enjoys them in the moment.

A good friend has time for you.

A good friend would sincerely miss you if you were gone.

pelicans

Birds of a feather sticking together at San Diego Zoo Safari Park

Weekly Photo Challenge: Abandoned

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May 399

When the storm rolls in

We flee

Deserting places and people

We love

Wary of winded truths

That fill the sky

Knocking down layers

Of little white lies

When lightening strikes

We run

Eyes and ears covered

In disbelief

Forfeiting our dreams

In the overcast

Denial is our fortress

‘Til the rain has passed

Truth

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It is what it is

Unobscured , sunlit

A guiltless glow of certainty

Barbed and bristly

Thoughtlessly exposed

Nettles rooted and ready

Unwittingly aimed

At pricking me

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#20

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“I am guilty of prejudging people.

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It’s a good thing I can change my mind.”

Let’s start with chihuahuas.  I have called them rats and swore they were one of the ugliest looking dogs on the planet. Then I met my mother in law’s dog. She likes to knit and while she does, her dog likes to sit on her lap with an afghan over her head. She doesn’t move. She guards her from anything bigger than her, which would be everything. She is completely loyal. She doesn’t like me…even though I consider myself a bit of an animal whisperer, she just doesn’t like me. I think she knows that I have judged her. Now she’s judging me.

On the human side of things (shhh, don’t tell her she’s not human)…

It is our nature to judge. We obviously need to use this handy skill for other aspects of our lives.  Heck, if we didn’t, we’d be back floating in the middle of a lake eating ho ho’s (o…kay, maybe just me).

We assess situations. We criticize and analyze. We judge ourselves.

So it is only natural that we would judge others.

I don’t think there is any magical learning experience here. I think when it comes to scrutinizing those we meet, we have to force ourselves to change. It is just a button we need to turn off. We need to tell ourselves DON’T DO IT! Be objective. Ask yourself why would I judge when I do not know. When it comes down to it, we do NOT know.

We generalize.

We stereotype.

We assume.

Now scroll back up. Look at that face and remember……

“You……know……nothing”.

Particles of the Past

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The past can resurface

 Creep into your disbelieving mind

Because now you see it differently

The validity of discontent

How much you truly suffered

And how far you have come

Now you see

The pain as a separate entity

An unwelcome foe from long ago

Knocking on your mind

Rattling your fortress of serenity

Trying to find a way in

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The past can return

Play with your peace of mind

Because it never really goes away

It is yours to subdue and restrain

Yours to push back into the darkness

Far from your precious light

Now you see

Under the light that you have kindled

With broken sticks and broken dreams

How easily walls can fall down

Leaving you vulnerable once more

Exposing your scars

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The past can sweep you away

Determined to turn you to dust

Shoving you back in the pile

Of degraded debris and dismay

Now you see

How easy it was to crumble

Because words alone can crush you to pieces

And it’s hard to get up

When you are a tiny particle

Of the past

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#17

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September 2011 450

#17. “If you think about where a person is coming from, what they’ve been through in their life, how they’ve been raised, you will find it easier to forgive, understand and accept that they don’t and may never look at things the same way that you do.”

 

This one is golden.

Do you want to be empowered? Free yourself from the frustration? Save some time and energy?

Ok, now I sound like an advertisement.

The truth is…

When this little light bulb of enlightenment switched on in my brain, it changed my life.

Click.

Not everyone was blessed with a loving beginning. They are what they came from. They may not be able to see or feel more than that. Not everyone has sailed a calm sea without drowning in pain or suffering…and some are still drowning. Some have a point to make, an axe to grind or a need to be heard. Some people can only feel better by making others feel worse.

Some people will not change. Some people don’t need to change…not for you.

Sometimes you have to rearrange your thoughts, open your mind and accept.

Let them be who they are.  Let it be what it is.

A huge burden can be lifted when you do.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…#16

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#16.”Worrying is a waste of time, but that won’t stop me.”

October 2011 291

Aguirre Springs near Las Cruces, New Mexico.

What could be

Is nothing more than fear

Merely stopping you in your tracks

To steal your moments

Pocket your dreams

And play with your intentions

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…#15

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#15. “Nature is amazing.”

SAMSUNG

A field

That’s all it took to enchant me

I have never returned

From the sound of the crickets

Blades  of green tickles

Or the smell of rain on the path

The path I walked

To school, to play, to think

The path I rode

My bike and my Honda 70

Over the bumps

Around that curve

Slowing down for sure

Because nothing’s for sure

Being cautiously crazy

Carelessly  stable

~

In the 70’s, life was about what we did. We DID things…without gadgets in our hands. We made things. We made things up. We looked for things. We found things. We entertained ourselves and created our own life, without Google and a status shuffle.

Playing outside was the key to our happiness as children.  We felt the wind, touched the grass, skinned our knees and burned our faces in the sun…without sunscreen.

Nature was part of my childhood. It fired up my curiosity and my imagination. Taking a walk in the field near our home gave me ideas. There was a large crater like hole surrounded by tall grass, which became a hideout. There were plants to identify and dissect. There were bugs to put in mason jars and tiny toads to capture in my cupped hands.

I always set them free.

September 2011 796

There were trails in the field and my younger brother took to them fearlessly with various dirt bikes, deliberately catching air over mole hills. I admired him. I admired him so much that I wanted to be the only girl in the neighborhood to ride a mini bike. After all, a girl can only force Barbie to try on so many of those silly plastic shoes.

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The trees I climbed, the wild raspberries I picked and ate, everything I saw and touched in that field is still with me today. I was blessed by nature. I need it to nourish my soul, calm my mind and recharge my body.

If you find the time to go for a walk…..stop.

Look.

Listen.

Nature comes to you when you are still.

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A & M visit summer 2012 510

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…..#14

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#14.  “I’d rather be taken advantage of once in awhile than have a closed heart.”

Random thoughts…

~When you give to another and they deceive you, it can hurt beyond words. The only thing worse is the nothingness you feel when you don’t give at all.

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~I honestly believe that to truly give, it has to leave you without something, at least for awhile. Something may be returned to you or it may not. It shouldn’t matter, if you gave for the right reasons.

~I was never a risk taker in my younger years. No way. I used my shyness as a wall. It protected me from disappointment, failure and rejection. Unfortunately, it also isolated me from life. It prevented me from finding out what COULD happen and what I could MAKE happen.  I eventually chipped away at the wall, taking the last of it out with some good swift kicks, finally breaking free ! On the other side of the wall, I was vulnerable. You have to be vulnerable in order to grow.

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~Opening your heart is really a personal choice. All I can say is that the odd times I have been taken advantage of  are small price to pay for the friendship, gratitude and personal reward I have received from reaching out.

~If I based my willingness to be open and generous on some of my past experiences, I could easily decide to hold everything I have and everything I am very close to my heart. That would be a burden. I would rather liberate myself from  bitterness, suspicion and doubt. It feels good to lighten the load

…and simply give.

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Clemency

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October 2011 427

Stone heart, you never knew

Faultless you were in realization

Clarification, inspiration

It’s how you grew

Bleak start, without the love

Basics were all they thought you needed

Stimulation, validation

Only words heard of

Fall apart, is all you do

Methodical daze of disintegration

Inflammations, resignations

That’s what you knew

Beaten by your own recall

Pictures lie in presentation

Allegations, provocations

I believe it all

Repeat, rewind, reverse the reel

Trapped in a time of condemnation

Deprivation, hibernation

Unable to feel.

YOU ARE FORGIVEN

Missing Hope

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Somehow the sun

Sneaks in

Unnoticed, even shunned

By those not ready

For the flicker

Of a flame already snuffed

So many times

By paralyzed thoughts

Of reality known

And dreams departed

Somehow the sun

Slips gently

Making contact, though rejected

By hearts still twisted

With past and pain

Blocking rays, restricting light

As life gives moments

Short yet sweet

To collect and keep

Or resist and release

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…..#10

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#10. “In an instant, your world can be turned upside down. The people you take for granted can disappear in the blink of an eye. Tomorrow is only a plan. This moment is all you have.”

It was October of 2000. It was a Saturday morning when the phone rang, waking me up from a deep slumber. As one who usually dreaded the worst, I assumed this 7 a.m phone call meant something was wrong. Perhaps my grandmother was ill but in the back of my mind, I thought “calm down, it’s probably just a wrong number”. Nothing could have prepared me for what I was about to hear.  It would have been the furthest idea from my mind. It was unthinkable.

When my crying mother said my brother was “gone”, I asked where he went. He was single. He could go wherever he wanted. He had no significant ties. I thought…. where in the world could he have gone that would upset my mom so much? What was she talking about?

Confused and half asleep I asked her, “Where did he go?”

“He’s dead”, she muttered  with whatever strength she could dig up from……somewhere. My mother had waited hours to call me. She just couldn’t pick up the phone.

He was 36 years old. He was my baby brother by three years.

He was my only brother.

I fell to the floor. I remember so clearly the sound that came out of my mouth. I remember pacing back and forth and screaming “no” over and over. I am sure at that moment, I was insane. I remember crawling up the stairs, waking up my ex husband. I was not me, but just an empty, robotic being, mumbling, sobbing, shaking, running around the room……lost in denial.

I cannot understand to this day how I drove an hour and a half by myself to get there. My two sons were still asleep (or were they?) and their dad would stay there with them. I didn’t want them to know anything about their uncle yet…because it couldn’t be true anyways. That was the plan I managed to somehow articulate before running out the door to my car. I was going to see him because that was the only way I could prove that this wasn’t happening.

The next time I saw my brother, it was Halloween night and he was in a casket.

DEATH is sneaky. Don’t ever trust it. It hides away mysteriously and then leaps out of nowhere to blindside you into oblivion.
LIFE is precious. Don’t ever take it for granted. It is amazing, breathing and beautiful and it never hides. Take everything it has to offer.

Don’t wait until the phone rings or there is a knock on the door. Live your life to the fullest.
Every minute unfolding in front of you is amazing.

~ In memory of my brother, his laughter, his incredible smile , his song , his silly dance and most of all, his loving heart.~

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#9

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#9.  “Happiness and contentment in your life only happens because you are happy and content with yourself.”

Throughout my twenties and thirties, I had a vision of what would make me happy. It was a perfect world and time.   It was just outside the box of reality I lived in, but completely achievable….or so I thought. It was more than just career goals or personal milestones. It was this imaginary idea of what my life should be like. I constantly pined for it . I was always waiting for it.  I like to think that I had some kind of epiphany about this but maybe it was just a few hard knocks that forced me to finally free myself of these ridiculous and unnecessary expectations.

As I approached 4O,  I found myself again…under the rubble of wishes and good intenti0ns. Wow, I was M.I.A. and didn’t even know it!

Why is it that different things make different people happy? Maybe it’s because it is our own particular state of mind that reacts. Happy things make happy people happy. They don’t work as well with unhappy people. People in my life have suffered similar challenges and losses. Although they all found themselves drowning in  despair and self pity, some have not come back up for air. They are still swimming around in the aftermath, hanging on to what happened to them, their only strength is their pain. It’s really easy to be unhappy. It requires no work on our part. Acceptance requires action but believe me, it is worth it in the end. Our own contentment welcomes the laughter, the warmth, and the beautiful stillness.

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California breathin’

Feeling inspired to write a poem today…….

SEARCH FOR SERENITY

Taking, needing, wanting

All the while believing it is the goal

To find, to get, to hold

A dream deserved

Only to realize

The illusion of plans

And the truth of fate.

Giving, accepting, feeling

As each moment ignites only briefly

Feeding the soul for only now

Is there anything

Not conjured up

Or wished upon

Only within is there light

To find, to get, to hold.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#7

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#7. “Don’t be afraid to take a stand. The people that matter will not hold it against you.”

I used to care….REALLY care about what others would think if I was more aggressive with my opinion. I still care. The only difference is that these self conscious feelings will not stop me. I don’t let them. I can only hope that those who are important in my life will accept me no matter what I stand up for or what I believe.

“ Why not go out on a limb? That’s where all the fruit is.”

Mark Twain

Mark Twain (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

~Mark Twain~

Now that’s a good quote, truly better than mine. Love the imagery.

I spent at least the first half of my life sticking like glue to the trunk of the tree, afraid to move. It took me a long time to ……change? That is really what it boils down to.  There was no divine  intervention that took place to transform me. I just got tired of the  “me” that I had become. Somehow I was enlightened that change happens by changing your mind. It is purely psychological. You can remain the way you are, if you’re happy with that, or you can move on.  Find new ways to interpret and live your life.  Some significant losses and events in my life also gave me more reasons to venture out of my safe haven. When people you love die young……I think you know the rest.

Recently I took a stand by supporting a movement for environmental issues. The group made headlines around the world. Like many other movements, it has a strong message although not always delivered in a consistent, united or organized fashion. The cause reflected my beliefs, my morals and certainly my love for a clean world or “Mother Earth”, as this group refers to it.

I am a non-native working in a native community surrounded by chemical plants. I “get it”. I breathe it.

Taking a stand for this group took me on a couple walks of peaceful protest. I have to say I enjoyed every minute of it.  The prospect of change taking place because people speak up, people reach out, people  stand firm, is at the very least, inspiring.

Taking a stand can be easy, if you don’t think about the risks. You just get out there, balancing with whatever you have to stop you from falling. Pride, determination, strength or even disregard for what can happen because you believe it can’t be worse than playing it safe. There are times in your life when you gamble more. First day on the job….not so much. Veteran in the field…..let it rip. Just my opinion.

Limbs can break.  Sometimes what we’re standing on is not as solid as we thought.  We may or may not have been aware of that, but we got out there anyway. That’s the beauty of it.  Hopefully, when we hit the ground, we are unscathed. There are many more trees to climb.

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Great place to stand alone
Aguirre Springs, New Mexico

 

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#5

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#5. “Everyone you meet in your life will teach you something…..if you’re willing to learn.”

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If you think about how much you have learned over your life time so far, it is probably at the very least, mind blowing.  By asking simple questions of those you meet, you can multiply this amount of information over and over.

There came a time in my life (probably around 40,  since I have evolved slowly), when I realized that every unique being on this earth has something to offer me.  I have always found human behaviour to be quite fascinating but within this hobby of observation, it is easy to analyze and judge.  When I tried to curb this a bit, I began to see more, learn more and feel more.

Besides the obvious factual information so easily obtained, there is always a story, an undertone that whispers  softly , if  you listen….I mean, REALLY listen and imagine where it is coming from.

Do you think you can learn something from the homeless man begging for change on the street?

Absolutely!  He has a story. You can learn from his pain, his misfortune and the small acts of kindness that give him joy. You can learn from your own fear of him, as he approaches you.  Ask yourself why it is so hard to look at his face, even when you hand him your spare coins.  Is he not worthy of eye contact or is his lesson to you lying dormant within yourself? Everyone has a story. Your story may not be any more interesting.  It is just different. Your story is not worn on your sleeve every day, like his.

There are no limits to what you can learn, only doors for you to open or leave shut.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years……#4.

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#4. If you’re not thinking outside of the box, you’re living in a very small place.

As a child, the world seemed so big and never ending. My dreams were more like goals. Anything seemed possible. I didn’t hope to achieve them. It was only a matter of how and when. I  had nothing to compare them to, no similar situations to remind me of what could go wrong.  There were so many options, so much to see and do, so many places to go.

I listened.

I observed.

I believed in many things.

Then something happened.  It’s interesting that as I grew older, my mind began to filter out ideas that didn’t seem as logical or achievable….as least not to me, anymore.  Reality shoved it’s way into my tranquil, sunshiney space, ready to rain downpour on my parade, with  a few too many “in your face” experiences of loss, disappointments and heartache.  I was angry, resentful and mostly, just sad.

Later on, I think reality had overstayed it’s welcome. I was tired of what I had to do, what I had to face, how I had to live my life.  It wasn’t until I was 40, that I found my youth again. The doors flung open and I emerged like a giant clumsy child.

I’m baaa…aaack!!!!

Who says I can’t have fun? Who says I have to do things a certain way?  Who says I have to get old?  Who says people are everything they seem. They are not. I was ready to explore again, but this time a little bit of knowledge came along with me.  That can be useful.   I was ready to let go of everything holding me back and  move forward  “into the great wide open” as Tom Petty puts it.  The biggest surprise to me was how happy it made me.

The more open I became……

the more I listened,

the more I observed,

the more I believed.

How familiar that feeling was!

We were born with open minds. It is not our experiences that close our minds. It is our reactions to our experiences that close our minds. There is no right way of doing things. There are just many ways of doing things. That’s what makes people interesting. That’s what makes LIFE interesting.

Take a look at the Grand Canyon. You cannot see it’s boundaries…..the never ending space that beckons you to think past what is in front of you.

Think past what you know or where you have been.

Stay open. It’s fun.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#3

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#3. When tobogganing down a steep ravine, a wine skin filled with cherry whiskey, will soften the blow of every tree you hit.

Looking back at it now, I can’t believe we really owned one of these.  The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language describes it as “a bag made from the skin of a goat for example, and used for holding and dispensing wine”.

I am fairly certain that I was unaware of the goat skin as I sipped chugged my cherry whiskey, hoping my socks would stay dry. We were trudging through a foot of good packing snow with our plastic Magic Carpets, waxed up wooden toboggans and super flying saucers. Woooo Hoooo!!!

Life was good……in the 70’s.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years….#2

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#2. You can procrastinate about not procrastinating.

Even the word “procrastinate” sounds like something to avoid.  It has such an unusual and harsh tone to it.

Why do we do it? There must be a reason why we don’t get around to doing what we planned to do. My excuses are many.

There isn’t enough time in a day.

Shall I clean the oven in my sleep?

I’m tired.

I am not doing that until this gets done.

I’ll call her tomorrow.

I need to be in the right mood to do that.

It would take me ALL day and I don’t have all day.

I was at work. Does that not count as exercise?

It’s just a little piece bar of chocolate.

If I can’t do it right, I’m not doing it at all.

I know I’ll do it, but not now ever.

I’m tired……again.

There’s  a  tiny little sliver in my right big toe . (Ok, I made that one up)

My excuses are rather lame. My intentions on the other hand , are outstanding!  My mood is very perky when I make the conscientious decision of  drawing up “the list”. With my favourite pen in hand, I look for the perfect piece of “Things to Do” paper . Then, using my best handwriting, I proceed to make the most elaborate list of projects ever! It’s an amazing feat of futility.  It doesn’t stop me, however, from feeling incredibly proud of myself as I cross the first  easiest task off the list. Bravo!! A few more strokes of the pen and I’ll be on my way.

Then something changes. I think it has a lot to do with that “P” word.  Somehow “the list” finds a cozy little space where I can easily forget it ever existed.  I  plan to make a new list…..

after another little piece of chocolate.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 Years…#1

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A little over  a year ago,  I  found myself undeniably approaching  the big five oh (no!).  I was determined to make it significant, at least to me, so I decided to share  some things I’ve learned over the years…… the good times, the bad times, the crazy times and all those enlightening moments in between.

Some lessons take a moment, others a life time.  Maybe you can relate to a few.

Hope you find a moment to join me on a regular basis as I reflect on this roller coaster ride we call “LIFE”, starting with…..

#1 If you’re holding a grudge, you’re letting someone continue to hurt you.


Think about it.

Someone causes you pain.  They ruin your day….or maybe your life?

Wait a minute! Are you going to let them ruin your life? Do they deserve that?  Do YOU deserve that?

Carrying a grudge is heavy work  but only you can lighten the load.

Are you waiting for an apology or someone to have a life changing enlightenment?  You could be waiting a long time.

You may be the only one capable of moving forward.   Harboring the anger, resentment and pain is your choice.

Simple as that.

      Stay tuned for #2 !